Icecream obsessions

Wren took his first self-portrait on Monday. He was looking down at the camera on the dining room table and pressed TAKE.






Wren will be 16 months old this Sunday and he is increasingly opinionated. This morning he slept in until 6.30am so, instead of going straight home to nap, we could take a walk around Greenlake after carpooling. Wren loved the walk. All the way along the trail he pointed to dogs and said "oof oof" and to birds to say "kar kar" (for crows) and "mch mch" for feeding ducks (eating). He said "hat" a few times when passers by were wearing caps and became extremely excited when he saw starlings fly up into a tree "up up!!"

Another commonly repeated phrase is "die-die" meaning "dice dice". We store Joshua's role playing dice on a high shelf in the bookcase and every time I do diaper change I let Wren hold a could. As soon as he lies down for diaper change he holds out his hands and says "die-die" again and again until I submit. I am not sure what it is about the repetition but he likes to say words twice, as if for emphasis!

This picture is of a rare moment in which Wren was allowed to play with all the dice together. He is moving them from one bowl to the other.
Frost's Conservation Effort
After our walk around Greenlake we stopped at the library and the park. Wren helped at the library by removing books from the shelves indiscriminately so we were rather brief there. We managed to find a few books on lemurs for Frost to help him learn how to save the Hairy Eared Dwarf lemur. Since the Xeko game arrived in our house and Frost bought the stuffy Dwarf Lemur he is very keen to join in the conservation effort and has committed all his savings to this end. Tonight he became teary when we read that Aye Ayes are endangered in part due to local beliefs that they can cast curses which leads to them being killed out of fear.

Loving the Dump Truck
Back to Greenlake - Wren played for a long time in the sand at the playground using a borrowed dump truck and front-end-loader. He was so happy in the sand that I made an afternoon trip to Lowes to fill up with 10 bags of play sand for the neglected sandbox. Wren hated Lowes. He wanted to play in the fountain (not allowed) and to leave the cement and sand aisle (not allowed) and to be picked up when I had to push a heavy cart (not possible). After lots of struggle we made it home and the sandbox is now half filled with fresh kitty litter, oops, sand. Mental note: buy a tarp to cover it.

Helping out at School
Both boys came with me to school on Tuesday for an icecream social for incoming K-kids. Frost was very helpful, showing people around, answering questions and being generally charming and a good host. He even made nametags for himself and Wren. His read "Kid Helper" while Wren's was "Baby Helper". Wren didn't notice so it stayed on all night.


"Aye-aye"
I would love to say that the icecream social started us off on ice-cream but it started a few weeks earlier. Suffice to say that we have been very much into the ice cream of late, so much so that just breathe the word "ice cream" and Wren chants "aye-aye" [his version of the word] and rushes to the freezer door and tries to tug it open with many grunts, moans and whimpers. When it is opened for him he scoops up a tub of icecream and carries it to the island for serving. He knows the ice-cream scoop and starts the chant in the morning when we find it clean inside the dishwasher. He also tries it after lunch. Here is Wren with his first self-held cone.
I think it is amusing that he is eating icecream wearing his warmest sweater. It is sunny but it has been a very cold week. The icecream obsession has spread into the literary realm. This evening we read a library book on the history of icecream and learned the important fact that the most popular flavors are (in order): Vanilla, chocolate, neopolitan and strawberry.

Our Children Can Swim with Dolphins aka 'when do you qualify for charitable fun?'

I subscribe to a discussion list with the congenital heart information network. Its a great list to connect with other parents of kids with CHDs and some who have graduated into the great big world of adult cardiology. Alongside the many issues of concern on themes such as:

• Blueness: What is too blue? What about blue toes in the bath? Blueness that is occasional? Purplish twinges?
  
• Awful doctors: Can you believe they said that to me? Did that to her? Ignored that again?
  
• Miraculous recoveries & absurd cures: If you pray / wish / visualize / eat only celery this will go away.
  

there are these fascinating string of discussions on the subject of charities that offer treats, trips, gifts and just jolly good experiences to kids who are sick. These fascinate me.

The most well known of them is, of course, the Make a Wish Foundation referred to on the lists as MAW. It is appropriate. The politics of the MAW seem to bring mature parents to the edge of the abyss. See, unlike those shows you see on TV, to qualify for MAW kids do not have to be on death's door. The door could just be bigger or less blurry than for other kids. Those who may qualify are those who have "a life-threatening medical condition" and ages between 2. 1/2 and 18 at the time of referral are potentially eligible for a wish. But MAW seems to have different qualifying standards in different areas so while one child would qualify with a 'garden variety' critical aortic stenosis requiring a Ross procedure in another area you have to have HLHS or transplant.

Parents have to wrestle with other decisions. When to apply for charitable fun? If you apply when they are a young child they don't get as much input and may not have as much fun. But what if they really are going to get sick, too sick to go? You don't want to miss it? Or alternatively, what if they are going to get well... to well to qualify? You don't want to miss it?

Also, your child may qualify for a wish or a trip or, as I learned today - a swim with a dolphin - but you may feel icky about it. Being in mortal danger is not something to be desired and many of us with 'healthy' kids with CHD's are not eager to rock the boat and enter the realm of the newsworthy even if they qualify because of the inherent risk their condition poses.

No sirree.

So, unfortunately, we will not be swimming with dolphins anytime soon - for free or otherwise. But I am dreaming about Hawaai at the end of the year and wondering whether we could just live without a deck for a long long time in order to maintain a healthy holiday fund.

To erase all messages press erase again. Beep. Messages erased.

I think the established wisdom about SAHM's (stay-at-home-moms) is that they need a bit of alone time to recoup their grace and splendour (aka sanity). Sharing misery or exhaustion I have often been urged to take a mommy-time-out at the spa or coffee-shop or restaurant or in the basement with the door shut. It is supposed to replenish us with love for our children and husbands and cooking and all that good stuff.

Since having the nanny two mornings a week and getting a bit more sleep in the past few weeks I have to say that the opposite has been true. After a few hours away from the kids I find myself reluctant to return to being a SAHM. I know we are not supposed to say this because it might tempt a malevolent deity to teach us a lesson, but I have been remembering how nice it was when Josh and I did not have kids and it was all quiet and there was room for self expression and self determination and many other phrases with "self" at the front. I miss it! I don't want a few stolen hours, or a job that drives all the tasks of a day into less time so I work two shifts. I just want privacy.

Some of you will be mentally rephrasing that to "personal space" but that is not it. I don't just want personal space. I want P-R-I-V-A-C-Y. I would like my desk to be private so that Frost and Wren do not smash my laptop and drop the bills all over. I want my breakfast to be private so I don't have to sit in squished avocado while I spoon dripping yoghurt into someone's mouth and pour milk into ovaltine from someone else and throw out the newspaper without reading it. I want our bedroom to be private so we can have sex if and when we want to - ok, after the kids are in bed. Unfortunately, half of them are in our bed still. The larger half of the children (by mass).

Of course, I had these desires before the respite nanny but I had forgotten how it felt to really kick back and drink a whole latte and then sit a while with an empty cup. That is the sweet time. The excess of solitude. The time when the ongoing assault of the child-noise is just soothed away. Who needs a massage when you have a nanny.

Of course, my moment of privacy as a blog author has come to an end abruptly as Wren cannot fathom how to play my voicemail since he has deleted it all already. He wants the voices to come out again. Sorry.

It is an appropriate ending to this observation.

Haircut happiness and lots of climbing

Its been less than a week since I last posted and I feel I need to write a book to cover all that has been happening.

First up, I had my long hair cut off. I went to a little local salon called Hair By Joey. Its not a salon strictly speaking, but a micro-salon in Joey's house in the Maple Leaf neighborhood. I have never before had a stylist LISTEN to me so intently and I am pleased with the result. Here is a picture of me with shorter hair with Wren in the background in the first one.



The next two pictures are from last week. During the last week in March we had the coldest weather on record. In the atmosphere above us (according to the NPR weather guy) they recorded the coldest temps in 32 years. As a result we had a rather freak snowstorm or series of snowstorms in the last week of March. In previous years I have been harvesting my first crop of lettuce and my potatoes were almost in. This year the soil temps are only mid 40's while we need 50's to plant. So, we are feeling the chill and my long coat had an extra workout.

Frost loved the snow and took the camera out in it to record his spring snowman. Wren was devastated that I would not let him romp outside (for long). It was just too damn cold! Wren is absolutely obsessed with being outside. Thankfully, we have had some mild sunny days this week and we have spent a long time each afternoon outside gardening. Wren loves it. He runs around and digs and tries to use the spade and the rake and picks up worms. It is going to be a fun summer with him.



I am trying to get our tax return finished so I am going to save some more Wren updates for another post. We are still here and more is coming soon!

Xeko Code LAMINA! Frost and the anagram

Frost and I are enjoying playing with our Xeko cards. As often happens, I bought a set at a thrift store for 50c and have had to spend $10 to supplement them with booster packs.

Our most recent accomplishment has been to solve Code LAMINA (aka Animal) in our Madagascar deck. After identifying the five code animals we decrypted the anagram EEDNNTOCC to spell "connected".

"All things in nature are connected" according to our Xeko wisdom.

We now have earned a new screen saver. Yippee!

Frost is very much in love with his hairy dwarf lemur furry.

"He is very cute. He is brown and has quite hairy ears. In real life he is about as big as a walnut but he is as big as an apple. I love him right as much as Wren. He is my little stuffy. I bought him and I am glad I have him. I love my hairy Dwarf Lemur. Signed - my hairy dwarf lemur and me" - Frost.

"Have toothbrush, will travel"

Wren's obsession with the toothbrush has continued. When I get back this afternoon I will be able to post a picture of Wren taking the toothbrush with us in the car because his loss-of-toothbrush tantrum made it worthwhile. As I drove the kids to the thrift store our drive was punctuated by "BZZZZZ" [silence] "BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ" [silence] as he played with the on-off switch. He would not leave it in his carseat while in the store so I had to keep watch on him to avoid losing it. I was also looking for a chance to 'vanish' the toothbrush but Wren kept a tight clutch on it so that was impossible.

Here he is travelling in the Sedona with the toothbrush:
And he insisted on taking it into the store with us too:
That afternoon we had the "no, you can't mop the kitchen" conversation after he opened the broom closet and brought out the mop. He also dragged the mop bucket to the kitchen and cried and cried when the mop handle kept catching on the cabinets and did not move around like it does when I mop. Later, I locked the mop up and he lay and wept plaintively and loudly outside the broom closet for a long while.

Later still, I put water in the mop bucket and showed it to him then became distracted and left the bucket in the kitchen. He took out the mop and put it in the bucket then dragged the wet mop across the living room to ask for help in mopping.

ARGH!!!

I offered him the smaller kids mop and bucket but it is not the same model and he is not interested in it.

He loves to copy things I do and yesterday I found him dipping toilet paper into the toilet. I know that is not something I do exactly but the older people in the house seem to have a relationship with the toilet and he is not quite sure what it is.

When he finds a wet spot on the floor (dropped water, bath splashing, dishwasher emptying, pee) he gets a rag out of the kitchen drawer and wipes it up himself saying "uh oh, uh oh" all the time. He is very worried about wet floors because he has learned he often falls over on them.

I have just put Wren to bed, still clasping the toothbrush. I guess we have to use our old toothbrushes tonight.

"Don't put my toothbrush in your shoe" (and other family arguments)

Wren has started to have tantrums when his will does not prevail. It started with the electric toothbrush at bedtime. One evening I allowed Wren to hold the electric toothbrush while I cleaned his teeth. After his teeth were done he did not want to let the brush go so I allowed him to take it to the bedroom where I managed to dress him holding a toothbrush in his hand. Then it was time to nurse so we lay down with the toothbrush between us. He hit me on the head with it. I took away the toothbrush and he started screaming and thrashing about. He nearly head butted me. I put him in the crib because he refused to nurse. He screamed for 10 minutes. It was bedtime and I had no idea what to do so I offered him my 'analog' toothbrush. He liked that. He explored its bristles and sucked the handle then settled down to nurse holding the brush. I put him in the crib with it and he let it go as he went to sleep. Argh!

His tantrums extend to even more impossible things. Things like riding the exercise bike and using a laptop computer. He stands by the exercise bike and points and says "UP UP UP". When I say "no" and do not lift him up to sit on the seat as Frost does he throws himself face down on the floor and cries and screams. Likewise if I do not allow him to sit at my desk and thump my laptop (the 'e' key has partially broken off from his usage).

I am a firm believer (if not practitioner) in positive discipline so I am trying to frame my parental requests in a collaborative way. I suggest that he plays with his toys instead of the electronics but he does not agree. Also, when playing he throws hard and heavy objects with the same enthusiasm as we throw balls. This has led to exciting statements such as:

"Wren, we don't throw elephants. We throw balls!"

Frost has received a number of injuries due to Wren hitting him with thrown remote controllers, wooden blocks, shoes etc. It is partially Frost's fault as he lies transfixed in front on the floor while watching TV and does not react in time to avoid impact. Still, Wren has also managed to headbut me on a few occasions as he throws a tantrum about being shod, or dressed, or fed or something else.

He is charming most of the time but he has a real will on him and I don't remember Frost being this demanding at this age.

Children's Tylenol - why do you have to use their cup?

This evening Frost developed a fever. At first it stayed low - around 100.5 - but by 10pm it had risen to 102.8. He was moaning as he tried to sleep and felt very warm so I decided to give him some Children's Tylenol to help him get some rest.

We have misplaced the cup supplied by the manufacturer. It went into the wash after the last round of diseases and it didn't find its way home to the medicine cupboard. However, I have many measuring tools from the days of Wren's oral medication and I happily measured off 10ml for Frost to suck up with my oral syringe.

That's when I noticed the big warning

"Use only the enclosed cup to give your child Children's Tylenol Elixir or Suspension Liquid. Tylenol products have been specially designed for use with the enclosed cup"

Does anyone know why or how? Do other measuring devices give wrong readings? Is 5ml of Children's Tylenol not really 5ml?

I started reading around a bit and found that people who are not medical professionals tend to measure things rather erratically and that measurement accuracy varies by method.

"CONCLUSIONS: Droppers and dosing cups were the most commonly used devices in the home for measuring liquid medications. Subjects were more likely to measure an acceptable dose with an oral syringe when compared with a dosing cup. However, a large proportion of study participants were unable to measure an accurate dose with either device. Community pharmacists should educate caregivers on the selection and proper use of measuring devices to improve the accuracy of medication administration in the home. "

[Accuracy of Oral Liquid Measuring Devices: Comparison of Dosing Cup and Oral Dosing Syringe Parisa Sobhani, PharmD et al]

As this study finds - in general the level of accuracy with a cup is less than with an oral syringe. So, what is it about this magic cup? Have they taken account of the viscosity of the liquid and taken into account the amount usually left behind when you drink from the cup? If so, shouldn't they caution the adult not to let the child lick the cup clean? Not to scoop or scrape every last drop from the cup?

I am just confused and need more information to know how to recalibrate my oral syringe to delivery the correct dosage of this product.

Frost is doing ok and is now asleep in bed. We will check on him overnight and hope that he feels better tomorrow and that Wren does not sicken with our latest scourge.

The Eagle Watching Trip

During Mum's last visit we went up North to the Upper Skagit area so Mum and Frost could go on a Bald Eagle watching raft ride. It has taken me a while to upload the pictures but here they are. In the first shot, Mum and Frost are about to board the bus from the meeting area to the launch site. The bus had a large black fin on the back in honor of its name Orca 2. At first, Frost was worried that I was not coming with him. He was also upset about all the layers of clothing he was being asked to wear. Frost does not like scratchy or hot clothing so he wore it on condition he could take it off if he became hot.


As you can see from this picture of the scenery. It was not exactly hot country. The river was snow-melt and there was still snow on the ground in the shade when we went upriver from Concrete.
Here are the "raft" crew on a tea break by the river. They saw about 10 eagles during the trip although it was not peak season.


Frost was very happy to be the lookout and called out warnings when he saw white water or anything significant. I only found out after the trip that he was not fitted with a child lifejacket. This one would not have been any good if they fell in. I have often said that if we travel to Indonesia with the kids we will take our own life jackets. That was since the leaky creaky fishing boat trip I took into the deep ocean with no form of life preserver on board. One motor was swamped, the swells were heavy and I was estimating how long I could float before I came within sight of land. Frost did not seem to face these anxieties on the trip although the water would have been a lot colder here.

Ah, an eagle. The greatest concentration of eagles was at the dam runoff where salmon are often killed being churned through water turbines. The eagles gather to eat the remains. We saw 5 eagles at the dam wall.


After the trip, Wren and I met Frost at the downriver landing. Frost is holding Wren back from entering the river as he searches for stones to throw.

Here the boys are throwing stones together.

We have a minivan, candy and a golden egg

After a mammoth visit to the Kia dealer we are the exhausted owners of a 2006 Kia Sedona. It is dark blue and has done 18K miles. It is a bit scruffy but will be detailed next week.

Meanwhile, we are enjoying the space and views from all windows.

After a ridiculous offer and a more reasonable counter-offer we declined to trade in our Subaru Outback Ltd. So, if you know someone in the market for a 2002 Outback with leather seats and relatively low miles then give us a call! I am going to get the moonroof serviced this week and try and fine a tame detailer to save Wren from living in the garage while I tend the car.

This evening Joshua asked not to talk about cars. He had to wake up early (for him) to get to the Easter Egg hunt at the community center and is now napping on the couch. It was a fun time hunting for eggs and Wren enjoyed eating chocolate. Frost enjoyed racing other kids for eggs filled with candy. Also, he managed to find and grab one of 3 "golden eggs" containing tickets which could be redeemed for an easter basket with a few bags of candy and a toy in them. He was thrilled to get a golden egg and said it was one of the best things that had ever happened in his life.

Unfortunately, I have no pictures of the Easter Egg hunt because I used the video camera. I do have some great footage of the Joy Of the Golden Egg. Pictures of the minivan will follow.