"Don't put my toothbrush in your shoe" (and other family arguments)

Wren has started to have tantrums when his will does not prevail. It started with the electric toothbrush at bedtime. One evening I allowed Wren to hold the electric toothbrush while I cleaned his teeth. After his teeth were done he did not want to let the brush go so I allowed him to take it to the bedroom where I managed to dress him holding a toothbrush in his hand. Then it was time to nurse so we lay down with the toothbrush between us. He hit me on the head with it. I took away the toothbrush and he started screaming and thrashing about. He nearly head butted me. I put him in the crib because he refused to nurse. He screamed for 10 minutes. It was bedtime and I had no idea what to do so I offered him my 'analog' toothbrush. He liked that. He explored its bristles and sucked the handle then settled down to nurse holding the brush. I put him in the crib with it and he let it go as he went to sleep. Argh!

His tantrums extend to even more impossible things. Things like riding the exercise bike and using a laptop computer. He stands by the exercise bike and points and says "UP UP UP". When I say "no" and do not lift him up to sit on the seat as Frost does he throws himself face down on the floor and cries and screams. Likewise if I do not allow him to sit at my desk and thump my laptop (the 'e' key has partially broken off from his usage).

I am a firm believer (if not practitioner) in positive discipline so I am trying to frame my parental requests in a collaborative way. I suggest that he plays with his toys instead of the electronics but he does not agree. Also, when playing he throws hard and heavy objects with the same enthusiasm as we throw balls. This has led to exciting statements such as:

"Wren, we don't throw elephants. We throw balls!"

Frost has received a number of injuries due to Wren hitting him with thrown remote controllers, wooden blocks, shoes etc. It is partially Frost's fault as he lies transfixed in front on the floor while watching TV and does not react in time to avoid impact. Still, Wren has also managed to headbut me on a few occasions as he throws a tantrum about being shod, or dressed, or fed or something else.

He is charming most of the time but he has a real will on him and I don't remember Frost being this demanding at this age.