Sunday, February 6, 2011

"You must eat 9 hot cooked brussel sprouts"

Sometimes you have to go out and leave your children with someone else. Seriously, you HAVE to.  If you don't how are you going to come home and find them excited about their custom origami fortune tellers?   How are you going to learn what your children see in your future.

Wren's fortune teller (realized by Heather)

Wren grabbed me first and asked me for my color.  Then he moved the fortune teller around and asked me for a number.  He can read numbers so when I told him I wanted 7 (yes, yes, I know its predictable) he picked the right one and moved it again.  My final choice revealed my future!  It is:

You get a 
spartan Lazer and 
a thousand bucks 
to buy 
it!

This was all written by Heather as per Wren's instructions.   I was very excited about the money and although I have not received anything yet, I remain hopeful.   Wren told me that I could have another fortune too.  Given the specific nature of the first fortune I felt that was appropriate.  I mean, you can have a fortune for relationships, one for work, one for spiritual growth surely.

My next fortune was about food.  I chose number 5 which informed me:

You 
must eat 9
hot cooked brussel
sprouts!
 
 Now, I am one of those people who like brussel sprouts so I didn't feel upset by this instruction, but I am also more comfortable with the astrological or fortune cookie genre of divination.  In these fields the fortunes tend to be general and uplifting rather than didactic and cruciferous.  I was concerned enough that I agreed to receive yet another fortune from Frost's fortune teller.  

Instead of colors, Frost's version started with the categories  RED, UMMMM, RANDOM LETTERS AND RAINBOW.
I was intrigued and chose RANDOM LETTERS.  

It informed me:

Ninja's burst through 
your window, Michael Jackson
moon walks.

While not exactly reassuring the form was reminiscent of a haiku and I interpreted it to mean I would live an exciting life enriched by memories of happy dead people.

At this point I decided I should look behind the veil, so to speak, and catalog the range of possible futures in my children's fortune tellers.  I opened them up and I am sure you are interested in sharing them.  Here is what else they said:

WREN's:

You win
hot chocolate
But it will cost you $5


Please
hang up and
try again.


Frost's:

I have been encouraging Frost to WRITE more to practice handwriting
and was impressed by his small script.

This is a bomb.

*

A female
bull falls in
love with you

*

As I count
to 10
Wren will burst into
laughter

*

Vacancy

*

You! "write with"
improper.  grammar
and I does
to


On reflection, this fortune is less about me and more about my kid's view of the world.  

For Wren it is about significant events which populate his day:  the weapons of Frost's video games, the imperatives to EAT YOUR VEGETABLES and the possibility of reward (hot chocolate!).  

Frost is more interested in being the provocateur, aware of the rules (bull-love, weapons, grammar) and poking them.  But then there is that laughter, that joy he gives Wren (along with the terror when he makes my old doll, Lucy, into a zombie pursuing him).  As long as I prevent him taking the This Is a Bomb note to school, we should live long and happy lives.

That is my soothsaying for the evening.

1 comment:

Mum In Awe said...

My daughter makes these all the time. We have boring outcomes like " you stink" , " you look funny" "you are lovely" or "you should wear better clothing". I MUCH prefer your kids! They are more interesting, and fun and creative!! I guess " I must work harder" to get my kids to think out the box.....