I have been using my coffee crutch a bit lately. Its not my fault (is it ever) - its the fact that I really like peace and quiet with my rain instead of rushing and driving. Driving in rain is so much work - you can't see properly, everyone is rushing, the single lane roads are always double breasted with traffic and the transitions are complicated by mud and... blah blah [insert complaining here]
But if you're inside and have coffee its so lovely. Its like a big sign saying "Sit back for some caffeinated contemplation."
Then in the middle of your relaxing midday-crisis when you're drawing Venn diagrams in your mind with words like "Botanical Illustration of mushrooms" in one and "World health activist" in another and "Wise Mother" in a third and you've just seen a potential overlap and then someone yells or breaks something or swears like a sailor and it goes like this:
Wren: Play with me NOW.
Me: I am just sitting down for a moment.
Wren: NOOOOO!!!! Crud!
Me: Wren! I am just having a moment of coffee and ...
Wren: I HATE YOU!
Me: Well, I don't like you either.
Wren: I AM GOING TO LIVE WITH DADDY ONLY. I WISH YOU LIVED SOMEWHERE ELSE.
Me: Well, I would like that right now!
And in your head you are rewriting those Venn Diagrams into "
Wise Juvenile Mother" and "Solitary Artist" instead.
Frost is reading his way through Pinkerton’s books [Thanks Mum]. He has read the Hobokin Chicken Emergency and is now enjoying the one about the Cat Whiskered Girl. He says they are very funny and have unusual things happening in them and keeps wanting to recount detailed incidents which sound a bit Dada.
Meanwhile, as you may have gathered from the earlier dialogue, Wren is practicing being a dictator and I am not going by the Parenting Books in my reaction. I am just done being reasonable (you can make some creepy laughter here if you think I have never been on the big R side).
If I were writing a book on Child Development I would get rid of the myth of the terrible twos and start a new theory of the Ferocious Fours. Four is horrible. Wren is vocal enough to explain his preferences with exquisite precision and loud enough to make that conversation painful. He is also cute enough to make his demanding conversations fascinating and worthy so you feel like a stink saying No to anything.
Actually, they are not conversations. They are directives. Four is all about telling us what he wants.
What does Wren want? The moment he gets up, Wren wants to PLAY with you. Rather, you have to play with him. IF you don’t he lets out a piercing angry shriek and falls on the floor in angry sobs. He likes to play Pigs in the [INSERT CURRENT LEVEL OR GAME HERE] and Magic the Gathering. Many times, he wants to “Check for something on the internet” or “Make a new deck” all before breakfast. Lately, with Daylight saving beginning and some residual time dislocation from our HAwaai trip, we are getting up by 8am for an 8.30am bus. There is no time for games.
What does Frost want?
Internet / games
Stay up late
A bedtime snack at 9pm.
What do I want?
Heck if I know but it better come with a coffee on the side.