New kind of normal

Wren had another reasonable sleep last night. He went to sleep at about 10pm and slept till 1.30am (yippee) and then again till 4.30am and then till 6am and then it was a bit patchy. Still, those are longer stretches than before and I am most pleased with him.

The house is in disarray. I seem to spend all day trying to get him fed or to sleep. The rest of the time is wondering how to carry him and a laundry basket or how to bend over to get the clean dishes out without squashing him. I set out this morning with the goals of cleaning the living room. I have rolled that back to cleaning the couch. I should do it now, I know, but I can't drag myself over there and away from the dregs of morning coffee on the desk. Plus there are all the bills not done and the KapKa book order I ought to do (Frost has selected a whole library of gimmicks I shall have to limit him on).


I am also meaning to look for a crib mobile or Gymini for Wren since the engine in Frost's one has gone kaput and the old Gymini has no toys and is stained with an unknown yellow substance. Even in the 5 years since Frost was small the toys are now all high-tech. The new Gyminis have mirrors, foot pads, noisy things full color mobile objects. I kind of want to lie under one myself. On the way home from Listening Mothers meeting this morning I was going to stop by the consignment store by U-village but when I went there it has gone for construction and Me 'n Moms is way over in Ballard so he will have to wait a few days.

I did get to the meeting this morning. Wren looked a huge fatty among babies in the group. Many of the babies almost a month older are not yet 13+ lbs so he is not lacking in the bulk department. We talked about "Falling in Love with Your Baby". I think it was different for me that for many of the others there because Wren was captured by medical technology for a number of weeks it took me longer to really feel he was my own baby. Plus, after having 3 consecutive losses before him I was always fearing I would have a miscarriage before he was grown, then I wondered whether he would survive his heart defect and when he was finally born it felt as if he belonged to the nurses and doctors for a while. Since he has been home, has started to smile and respond to us we get on famously - its always easier to feel gushing love for someone who is able to acknowledge you're there and he is giving little gummy smiles daily.